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Selma Cook

To the place where my hopes and fears collideTo the place where my hopes and fears collide
Wrestling, struggling to find calmness

Scooping it up from here and there casting it deep into my soul
Then wondering why it disappears in veils of scattered light

Running through my fingers – lost to me
I am afraid. I am confused. I am lost.

Lost in my own tidal wave of emotions, colliding
Threatening to envelope me – swallow me whole

Rushed to the limit – pushing my own self
Daring death, destruction at my own hands

Elusive calmness, elusive peace
I cannot find you though I stretch my mind as far as it will go

Scared to look within my heart constricted as it is
Scared to face my fears, the greatest dread

Pushing down the turbulence, ignoring it
While it bubbles up seeking recognition

As calmness lies beneath it – beneath the fear
I must wade through, look at fear eye to eye and let it go. Then wait.

For calmness and peace will settle wherever I leave space
Let go the fear and peace will alight.